New ‘Sharknado 3′ Trailer, Now With 100% More Hasselhoff

by | PopCrush

Sharks are having a moment in 2015: Adorable scene-stealer Left Shark basically won the Super Bowl Halftime Show and, on a much darker note, the Carolina coasts have seen a much higher-than-average 11 shark attacks on their shores. A child was attacked in KNEE DEEP water last month, which is terrifying enough to sell a few thousand kiddie pools this summer. SyFy couldn’t have predicted this level of cultural synergy, but it’s here, and so is the Sharknado 3 extended trailer. Watch it above! I’ll wait.

“I think we’re gonna start calling it the BEAST coast,” Al Roker jokes onscreen, in a fictional shark-related weather report. Nice one, Al, although your lighthearted #weatherburn is questionable given the clear danger this vortex presents. It’s a national disaster! That’s why David Hasselhoff is here, to rescue everyone. Probably. We imagine he’ll help in some way — it’s simply too soon to tell. Though he did tell EW that this sequel will be “the worst movie you have ever seen.” Maybe he’s never watched basic cable at 3 a.m.?

The trailer promises intentionally-bad fun. “These sharks, they have a scent,” Sharknado veteran Ian Ziering warns, “and it’s not a pretty one.” Is it the reek of rotting fish combined with a palpable bloodthirst? It should be noted here that Ziering has proven himself a master of high-camp, and will probably be the MVP again in this sequel.

The extended trailer also offers a catchy, terrible rap theme which, as you might guess, features the refrain “Oh heeeell no! Oh heeeey-ell no!” There’s a few weeks left to memorize it so you can impress your friends at the screening party.

Watch Frankie Muniz, Tara Reid and conservative talking head Ann Coulter (??) run from killer sharks on Wednesday, July 22 at 9/8c on SyFy.

Next: 'Sharknado 3' Is Coming to Dumb Down Your Summer